Why?

I'm still working on this and thinking things through. (But not letting anything stop me as I write and complete the story.)

So I've been thinking about why I'm doing this and what I hope to accomplish. Now I'm not a big planner. I've always been a seat of my pants kind of girl. There's a flow to things, and sometimes I get a feeling that the wind is blowing in one direction, and that I should follow rather than fight against it. (Though I will fight against it if I get a feeling that I should.)

So what am I hoping to accomplish here? Do I want to be famous? Well known and well considered? Maybe some of that stuff would be nice. Ok, I should be honest here. Heck yes, I wish I could make enough money that I could stop doing what I'm doing and do nothing but write!

That is a very real possibility too. Not at first of course, but given time and effort, yeah, it could probably happen. There are writers out there who are making money off their works that you never hear of. Many writers bemoan making only $1,000 off their work, and I'm like, "Damn! That's already how much I make in a month! I can live off that!"

But of course, I couldn't because there's more to think about. It's a business. That's basically what you're setting out to do, and that's what I would like to do. I want to go into business for myself. I want control of it, the rights to it, and I want to fiddle with everything, create my own image, write my own blurb, make my own cover. Nothing else appeals to me. And in fact, I think what originally turned me off from publishing was the fact that my book wouldn't be mine once I "sold" it.

There's also the terror that I'm intending to write a series because that's again what I feel. But I have no real control over it. I'm not a writer that can plan to write and then just do it. (Which is also a bad sign for me as an indie author, I know.) With something like this, I'm counting on myself which is somehow more pressure in one way and less pressure in another.

I guess because if I fail, I'm only letting myself down. And if I'm on my own, that desperation, that need and that drive will push me on and make me want to continue. It's sort of what's making me go now.

So I'm not planning on asking anyone to read what I'm working on until the online story version is done. It just seems like a good idea. By my most recent count, unless something goes wrong or my gut takes a detour, I'll be finished with the online version in eight weeks. And I should be 50% done (hopefully more) with the novel version by then or I will be very disappointed in myself.

But, uh, I do have the first couple chapters of the remastered version ready for download from here. (7,600 words at about 22 pages saved in rich text format) Thought about password protecting it, but I've taken down my own links to this blog, so I think that's enough. The first three chapters, still a work in process but closer to the original vision. The liner notes at the end of chapter 3 are because I'm thinking of taking those paragraphs out, or rewriting them, but was too lazy to fiddle with them right now.

My Marketing Plan

It's very simple and it involves a lot of begging.

I'm not good at advertising. This is a fact. But I do have other strengths that I can play up. I do this all the time when I go to sell things (like apartments) and it's worked pretty well for me so far.

I'm blunt and honest. Those are my strengths. How can I make those work for me?

Well, I already have Ruin up, I've got readers. Some comment but many don't. If my google web stats are right, I have about 40 subscribers (and 30 followers, but these all cross over plus this only counts google subs). I get about 70 page visits on Fridays when I'm supposed to update whether I update or not (we can knock that down to around 50 page visits just to kick out those people who probably stop back to check comments).

And that is all word of mouth really. I only post on VSS, so I haven't really tried very hard to get word out.


So my first plan is to finish the current story on Ruin. (We're so close-- I think.) Then admit that I'd like to make a book version and open up a discussion for it. Find out how many would actually be willing to go for that and support me. (For those who don't comment, I'd be willing to put a poll on the side.)

How that goes will determine a lot of things. It's sort of scary, but like I said, honestly and bluntness is my strength.

The next part is when I finish. Smashwords allows you to generate coupons. So once the book is complete and priced, I'd generate a coupon to make it free and post it on the blog because the readers are king.

Here is the part where I'd beg. Beg for them to pass word on, pass on the coupon (you can set how long the coupon will work so if you want it free for the first month, you can do that), and write reviews.

That's the main part to my plan really. Otherwise, I've started my site, got a separate twitter, started my Smashwords account. I'm a little embarrassed about it at the moment because I haven't put much thought into any of those, I just wanted to have them so I can start thinking about them and learning how to use Wordpress. I've gathered some helpful links and have a couple of blogs that I read and comment at using that info.

It's sort of awkward because I was thinking about how I hide behind my user name. I really do. So now I'm supposed to put my name out there and meet new people. And that's what I'm most uncomfortable about-- learning to stand behind my own name. That's why it's just my first two initials at the moment. I just honestly couldn't use my first full name.

So that's what I've got at the moment. I'm still in the process of experimenting and reminding myself that this is all an experiment.

I am going to make money

Maybe not much, but I will use my writing to try and support myself. This is a huge step for me. This is complete arrogance on my part that I am going to carry with me even on those days where I'm completely part of the real world and my practical side is screaming at me.

But I will try it. I am determined.

And if this somehow makes my work less, so be it. If it stops becoming art because I'm not a visual artist and I want to sell my words that I've poured my soul into, that's fine. I never set out to do art anyway. I identify more with pulp novels and comic books, and those were definitely created to make money.

I'd like to think there is something more to my work, but I am not the one who will decide that. People who read it will tell me. I'm just going to continue doing what I want to do and what I like to do. Because frankly, I am tired of being at the mercy of others when it comes to my shelter and food. Bosses who can cut hours, lay me off, replace me. Jobs where you get treated like shit because they know you need the job more than you need your pride. Even now I have this most awesome job, but what happens if my boss can't do it anymore? Will he sell? Will his family take over? How will they treat me? There are too many variables in control of my life.

But I have this one talent that I trust, and I'm convinced that I can do something with it. Now is the time to try and make it. Because who knows what will happen. Maybe absolutely nothing, but at least I'll have tried.